Policing isn’t always glamorous work. Sure, sometimes officers get to chase carjackers or arrest famous people, but they also have to do things like transport forcibly diapered assault suspects who leave the worst kinds of messes in the backs of patrol cars.
Sunday evening, a nurse at Harborview contacted two officers and said an intoxicated man receiving treatment at the hospital had assaulted her, spitting in her face.
When the man was brought into the hospital, he was apparently so intoxicated that Harborview security staff restrained him in a bed.
Somehow, while restrained, the man was able to remove his genitals from his pants, intent on urinating on the hospital floor.
When nurses informed the man that it was against hospital policy to just pee wherever, he told them he didn’t care “where he [peed] or who he [peed] on.”
In order to keep the man from urinating all over the hospital floor, the nurses decided to put a diaper on the man (apparently a rare occurrence at Harborview). While the nurses were removing the man’s pants and diapering him, he sat up and spat directly in one nurse’s face.
Officers arrested the man for assault and drove him from the hospital to the East Precinct. During the drive, the diapered man demanded officers return his pants, and threatened to urinate in the back of their patrol car.
Then the man made good on his threat.
Officers later booked the man into the King County Jail for assault.
Related fun fact: when someone turns a patrol car into a rolling biohazard, SPD has to call in a company to do the dirty decontamination work. That contracted cleanup work costs $123 per hour.