Officer Puts Herself In Harms Way to Protect Crowd From Horny Birds

Benjamin Franklin once described the bald eagle as a “Bird of bad moral Character.” While this characterization remains up for debate, one Seattle police officer was forced to put herself between a crowd of bystanders and the razor-sharp talons of two erotically-entwined eagles earlier this week after the birds crash-landed in a park.

As Officer Vanessa Flick drove past Leschi Park around 3:30 pm Wednesday, she noticed a large crowd gathering around a bald eagle, lying on a paved pathway.

Eagles

The actual eagles from this story.

“At first glance, I did not detect any movement from the eagle and assumed it was deceased, but then observed that the bird was blinking and breathing,” Officer Flick wrote in her report. “Upon closer inspection I noted that there were, in fact, two bald eagles on the path.”

While the birds were not fighting, bleeding or showing any other obvious signs of trauma, it remained unclear how they had come crashing to the earth.

One man recounted to Officer Flick how the eagles “appeared to spiral mid-air” together before descending into the park.

A second man, who Officer Flick described as “very knowledgable about bald eagles,” said he believed the birds had locked talons and become stuck after taking part in “a mating ritual.”

Officer Flick called the Seattle Animal Shelter to help the birds, and stayed with the eagles until their erotic entanglement took one final, majestic turn.

“I felt wind on my face and heard flapping,” Officer Flick wrote, “The two were taking off in flight together.”

The crowd in the park burst into cheers and applause. “Both birds then flew off, together, southbound.”